Five teachers with a combined 90 years of experience share advice for parents of two - to 5-year-olds. Getting the Best from Your Kid I worry my 3-year-old, Sophie, has a split personality. At school she cleans her toys up, puts on her shoes, and is entirely self-sufficient at potty time. At home, she whines when I ask her to pick up anything, insists that I join in the restroom whenever she must go, and lately has started demanding that I spoon-feed her dinner. Clearly, her teacher knows something that I don't. But , what parent hasn't occasionally wondered: Why is my child better for everybody else than for me? The simple answer: Your child tests her limits with you because she trusts you'll love her no matter what. But that doesn't mean you can't invest a few plans from the preschool instructors ' playbook to get the best from the little one. We asked educators from around the nation for their hints so listen up and take notes! .
Resist doing for her what she can do herself.When it might be quicker and easier to do it yourself, it won't help to make your child more self-sufficient. Quick suggestion: Appeal to her feeling of pride, indicates Donna Jones, a preschool teacher at Southern Oregon University's Schneider Children's Center in Ashland, Oregon. Whenever I'm trying to get kids to dress, put coats on, sit on chairs during foods and so on, I'll ask them'Would you need me to help you or can you do it yourself? ' Those words are like magical, claims Jones. The kids always want to do it .
Warn of transitionsIf your child pitches a fit whenever you pronounce it's time to change gears --if that means shutting off the TV, stopping play to come consume, or departing a friend's house -- it could be that you simply 're not giving enough advance notice. At college we let children know when alterations are coming so they have time to complete whatever they're doing, observes Cohen-Dorfman. If you have to leave the home at 8:30 a.m., warn your child at 8:15 that she's five minutes to perform, then will need to stop to put away her toys. Set a timer so she knows when the time is up.
Prioritize play.Preschool teachers said over and over that children now are unable to perform imaginatively than children of a decade or two ago. A lot of their day is structured in supervised activities, says Haines. The antidote: Obtain comfortable stating Go playwith. It's not your job to see that your child is amused 24/7. Let her get a little exhausted. But make sure she has things like dress-up clothes, paper and paint, a big cardboard box, and play dough.
Do it to music.There's a reason the cleanup song works. Establish a task to music, and suddenly it's fun, states Sandy Haines, a teacher at the Buckingham Cooperative Nursery School, in Glastonbury, Connecticut. In case you're not feeling creative, suggest racing a tune: Would you get dressed before Raffi finishes singing 'Yellow Submarine'?
Utilize sticker charts and benefits judiciouslyIf your child is working for the reward, he won't understand the actual reasons for doing things -- which he must pick up his possessions because family members throw, says Buss. Finest bet: Reserve benefits for finite jobs, such as potty training, but avoid offering them for regular things, like dressing himself or brushing his teeth.
Lighten upIf your child refuses to do something, try turning it into a match. Humor and games are just two great tools that parents sometimes forget about in the heat of the moment, says Zebooker. When her own son, now 13, was in preschool, she had to persuade him to put his shoes on in the afternoon by playing shoe store. I'd say, 'Welcome to Miss Mommy's Shoe Store, I've got the perfect pair for you to try on now,' and that I 'd talk in a silly accent and he adored it. (I've had luck using this strategy with Sophie, who was able to clamp her mouth shut whenever I attempted to brush her teeth. Now we play with the Let's Guess What You Ate Today game -- and she willingly opens up so I can hunt her molars for cereal, strawberries, or mac and cheese.)
